I need to free my system of all of it's TOXINS!  I've been dealing with some very toxic PEOPLE and SITUATIONS lately and I just need to CLEANSE!!

Right now I'm DEAD tired, I've been working too hard again.  And for what!?!?  Nothing!!  They don't appreciate me.  They completely disregard my relevance in my position and that kinda pisses me off.  Like today, I've been handling the new employees EVERY TWO WEEKS for a while now, but when it comes to the processes and procedures dealing with MY presentation every two weeks, my deputy Director doesn't even want me to be a part of the meetings that are being scheduled to help the process run smoother.  Thats BULL!!  And I told my supervisor that if I can't go to the meetings then she should just find someone else to do my presentation.  What's the point if I cant get first hand knowledge on what I'm doing wrong and what I can do to improve it.  Best believe that I'M the first one they blame when it doesn't go smoothly!

Anyway, I've decided that in 2009 I'm going to get rid of everything that's TOXIC to me.  I knew at the beginning of this year that I wouldn't get through the year with the same friends.  My friends are shifting and I'm FINALLY figuring out that I'm a HORRIBLE judge of character.  This almost always bites me.  Even though people tell me the fire is hot, I still have to touch it for me to believe them. 

Crazy, I know, but it's true.  I have to give people the benefit of the doubt before judging them too harshly.  I'm always all about making new friends and the ones I can actually keep are always only the ones that have been through some hard times with me or the ones that have known me the longest.

It takes a lot to have to deal with me.  I don't know why, but it does.  I'm a very friendly person, but there is something in my personality, a certain kind of dominance, that makes it difficult to deal with me. But I'm very friendly and I wouldn't hesitate to welcome someone in. 

The only problem I have with people who don't know me that well is that they tend to take my kindness for weakness.  It's all good because when I get into "bitchmode" watch what I do.

.......okay, I almost fell asleep at this computer!  I gotta go, I'll talk to you again soon!  I gotta get up and go to work as early as I can tomorrow.  See ya'!

Kris, you are one of the most dedicated people I have the pleasure to know. And one of these days, when it comes down to the wire and they really need you, your bosses are going to discover just what a gem they had... and lost. They don't deserve you, my friend; they really don't.

As for being a good judge of character, well, I think you do just fine, hon. I just think there are some people who are really good at snowing other people, is all. I know what you mean about having to find out for yourself - I'm the same way - but I don't think you're a bad judge of character. Like you said, your FRIENDS are the people who go through LIFE with you (ups, downs, and in-betweens)...

Love you, Kris... YOU ROCK, girlfriend...

Hey beautiful, just popping in to say hi and to thank you for coming by to visit me. I hope things are going better for you, sweetness; you really do deserve a break...

Take care, Kris; talk to you soon...